Some women report knowing the exact moment they have conceived. Many others ‘know’ they are pregnant before any test has been done. (Tests available, without prescription, from a pharmacy can tell you within a few days.) How do you know? A combination of intuition and sensitivity to your body changes seems to help you notice the earliest stirrings of the new life inside you. Whether it has taken a long or short time for you to conceive, whether planned or not, feared or hoped for, the moment of confirmation of pregnancy is an awesome one, deserving of celebration. Go out and have a meal, (with a glass of mineral water!)


Even if all the preamble has been positive, the momentousness of definitely being pregnant is still accompanied by just plain shock! Parents find themselves thinking: ‘Not yet, I’m not ready’ at the same time as — and perhaps because of — knowing they can’t go back. Even the most longed-for, hoped-for and awaited pregnancy does not escape this ‘Oh, my God’ reaction.

Just because you are feeling this way, don’t jump to the conclusion that you’ve made a terrible mistake. What you are really feeling is the ever-present truth which we usually choose to ignore — that nature or God or the power of the universe runs our lives and we are never in complete control. Perhaps the pregnancy is not as perfect as we had hoped or the timing is not quite right. But that is done now. We are on the roller coaster and it has just pulled out of the station. We can want what we want with all our hearts and plan thoroughly but, in the end, nature chooses.

So don’t feel scared. Breathe a little more deeply and slowly, expand your spirit and feel what it really is — not fear, but awe. You are in on the creation of life.

This is the first and most important lesson of parenting.